to me, home is wherever i am at now. where i grew up at, where i know by heart every single crook and every single corner, where i've spent the whole of my life at. here, where i am at now. and i'd never trade home for anywhere else.

so, after an entire day at school or after hours at work, the only place i look forward to heading to is home. nothing makes me feel better than knowing that i will be going back to a place where i can shed all defenses and pretenses and just be myself, open and bare to whatever may come. plus, coming home to papa who will always ask if i've had a tiring day at work and mummy who will always have food prepared for me is lovely, too! :)

hehe, okay! so school has resumed for two weeks now… i cant believe that i am already on my third trimester and am left with only two! looking at how quickly time moves on, it wont be long before im blogging about finally ending school. sigh… im pretty sure i will miss going to school, although i find it a dread right now. is it crazy if i say that i still dream of going to ulca or any universities in california to study film? is it crazy to still dream of being able to pursue what my heart so very desires…? know what? i don't care. this is my life and i get to choose, bleh!

but we'll see, we'll see! i've decided that i shall give my best for now! yes, i know, i've said this so many times, even i have lost count! XD i donno… like how there is a reason why i feel uncomfortable with some people no matter how long we've known each other, there is also a reason why i put in effort and why i don't. i just don't know why- yet. lol. but i guess school means there is no choice; i just have to put in effort. okay, so i promise! no more half-assed jobs, only full-assed jobs! because if i've always wanted yunho as a brother and if he was my brother, im pretty sure that he'd be very disappointed with me.

which is also why i've decided to give that lecturer a chance, no matter how much i may dislike her way of teaching. i don't think i can ever forget that feeling when i turned to look at her and there she was, back on the class and writing on the whiteboard… it was just something about that moment that struck me so hard. i was so ashamed of myself for thinking and saying anything i did before.

we all are humans. if i have feelings, then she has to have feelings too. so even though she wont ever get to see this, i still want to take this chance to apologize. i am sorry, for being such a immature adult. i promise that i will take every class seriously and that i will do my best for everything! yes, including the weekly quizzes, but there is no guarantee that i wont complain. lol.

besides school, there's also work! so far so good, and i know that when i feel good about something, i'd hardly ever get a chance to not feel good about it. thank heaven for the good environment and the awesome people! :Dv co-workers and customers, alike! after all, we're all part of something big~ hehe! and work has set back on the right track: discipline! waking up early and being early/on time! and having proper breakfast! seriously, mummy prepares such fat sandwiches, i don't think i can ever go a single day without breakfast as filling as them!

but yes, like a coin, there are downsides too~ i've been unable to write regularly because my thoughts are choppy and all over the place! T_T school exhausts my mind, and i always retreat into my little rest area in my mind… work tires my body, so i always end up heading for the bed. LOL. but i promise, i will try to write a little something everyday! because, who am i to say that i want to become an author if i don't write? :)

AND YES, GUITAR! im so excited and extremely proud of myself, because i no longer twist my own wrist while practicing the f chord! now i can do all barre chords already! i have to credit jay for this because i wanted to play the acoustic version of "cant live without you" (which is really beautiful; just his voice and the guitar) and so… yeah. XD now it's just the chord progression that i have to work on, but im really improving! slowly but steadily, nonetheless! im looking forward to the day i can play the f chord confidently, heheheee. and yes, please welcome the new member of the family, my uke baby, HAZELNUT! courtesy of morgan, lol, in case she reads this. hahahaa. life would really be complete if i had a keyboard too! i have a toy one, though. lol.

hmm~

i am blessed. i truly am blessed and i thank heavens for blessing me, no matter how horribly i've failed before. thank you so much! please bless all the people i love, too! keep them safe, healthy and bless them with happiness they all deserve.

:)

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and because im in love with jay's voice! he has really improved ALOT, especially through his episodes of 'immortal song 2'. lovely, lovely voice!



my favorite performance. he looks so happy, haha! AND! jay looks the sexiest with clothes on, with his hair like this (really, the blond just adds a subtle touch of sexiness) and with the glasses. lol. this is one of the rare times i see the word 'SEXY' flashing on the screen. lol. enjoy his voice la hor~