a piece of purple acrylic with a crack, and the boy from 8 years ago.

before we know it, it has already been 8 years. it has been a long time, right?

but until today, all it takes is just a little jolt of my memories- it may be something i saw, or words people said, or maybe even people who somehow had the same name as you do. all it takes is just a little jolt.. and i'd remember you again. then, i would smile. sometimes a sad smile, sometimes a happy smile. but most of the times, i dont really know. all i know is, even though i have let you go, a special part of my heart still belongs to a special you.

i have been thinking. wondering, pondering.. just thinking, and asking. not just for the past few days, weeks, or months. maybe i was always in denial, convincing myself that everything was but a fleeting moment. but what kind of fleeting moment lingers for such a long time? ahh, this is really hard to explain.

maybe i didnt just liked you a lot, a lot. maybe it crossed over to love. maybe i loved you a lot, too.

benjamin tan de hua, my bestest friend since 11 years ago, was correct. (who better than him to tell me, lol!)

you are my first love.

and maybe because i loved you so much, i am unable to love anybody the way i did love you.

one day, even when i have found somebody i can and will love just as much or maybe even more, that special part of my heart will still belong to a very, very special you.