Hello there, I think I'm suffering from writer's block again. Scratch that, this is worse than a writer's block; this is laziness. No, it's in between writer's block and laziness… lol. It's like there is a cork at the opening of my mind (somewhere, there has to be an opening… lol) and while my mind is getting swollen with everything, I still can't let anything out because of the wretched cork. So I am attempting to pop it now and hopefully everything clears. :Dv

Hmm.

I'm not sure if I have ever talked about this before, though I vaguely remember bringing it up somewhere. LOL.

Hmm.

The night. It's the night. Ever since I could manage it, I've been staying up as often as possible. No matter how tired I am, as long as the switch in my head doesn't go off, I can't fall asleep. I used to think of myself a night owl, a nocturnal, but then I realize that it may be something more than that. Lol. It's along the likes of a fascination, an addiction even. It's a win-lose situation, though, because this addiction is one that only losing sleep feeds. And I… love… to sleep. Lol.

Although I do not sit by the window and watch it happen (it's plain scary and I don't want to have something/someone jumping out at me lol), I like knowing that an entire city has gone to sleep and I am still awake. It's like I am watching over them- or watching them, like the stalker I can sometimes be- and I am completely entranced by the feeling that comes only when I watch the city go to sleep. And yeah, retiring to bed only when it has awoken. I try not to wait up until then, though, because age has caught up with me and there is only so much I can do to stay awake. LOL.

But it is fascinating, absolutely fascinating! The way the lights slowly go out and sleep blankets everybody, and the way the roars of the early vehicles of the day's first workers slowly lead to the first rays of the morning. Fascinating, simply fascinating. There was a period of time when I would wait for the sounds of engines starting up and running before finally slipping under my covers. There is a sense of comfort in knowing I was there to "witness" everything, as strange as it may sound, and I'd always fall asleep with a smile. And no, I'm not crazy. Just crazy in love with the night.

The night. It's the night, and the buzz of the energy of the night. It gets better during full moons, simply because. LOL. The silence of the night allows noise to happen; it is an invitation for those thoughts to begin. Then my mind churns and before I know it, I am already barely catching up with the train. Of thoughts that make no sense and are of no relevance to each other. As much as I am (sometimes) overwhelmed by this, I am completely embracing it! It is during such times I find the answers that I need. Clutters aren't always bad, you know, if you are willing to go through them bit by bit. And I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels this way. :)

And yeap! I've found what I needed in the clutter! With it, I'm refreshed and all charged up again. :D See, I really live much better with letting things be and letting them fall naturally and nicely into place. I've tried to, err, stick to a plan and I got all stressed out when it didn't work out. Then I just let things be and wala~ Here I am. Lol.

:Dv

Same old, same old: I run with neither rules nor routines, with neither regulations nor structures. If my life was a picture, you can be sure that you won't find any straight lines. I just… don't work that way.

:D

I think I'm done with popping the cork, right?