yes, they will. =)

the root of the only troubles i will ever have are when im caught in situations that requires me to make decisions. decisions that will compromise time that i get to spend with my family.

after everything that has happened- if i haven't already realized- the most important thing and people in my life is my family. my father, my mother and my sister. the three most important presences and existences in my life; i want to be there with them and for them, the way they had for me. life is short and unpredictable.. we never know what will happen next so i want to spend as much time as possible with them.

at the same time, there are so many things that i want to do. so many things i have eyes on, so many things i want to go after, so many things i want to try and so many things i want to achieve. if i can, i will put my heart and effort into every single time. and i will, because i want to.

it's just that im no superhero.

i cant make time stop or make slow it down. i cant split into three or four or five pieces. most of all, as much as i want to, i cant find enough confidence in me to do it all.

this is why i don't plan anything in advance, unless necessary or if it's something out of my control. maybe it's because im a cancerian; like water, i prefer to just flow with whatever goes along. whatever comes in my path, i take. if im strong enough to carry it with me, i will. if it's too heavy, then i'll let go. just like water. or maybe because im lazy and am finding excuses. lol.

i may not have set anything permanently in stone but i have them roughly lined up. things i want to do and will do… and hopefully complete within the expected time frame.

this is just like what papa always tells me about not expecting to reach a place in the time you have estimated, because you cant predict the traffic, the weather or anything else for that matter. and like always, i stubbornly did my estimations without taking into consideration unexpected things that would suddenly pop up.

sigh. i never knew that me being horrible in math would be carried over to life's estimations too… lol!

ahhhh! it would be great if i had an elder sibling (in fact, i really, really wish that yunho is my elder brother right now!), because then i would have someone to turn to for advices. T_T

but yeah, im gonna try to be a mature 20 year old and try to carefully think things through before finalizing anything. =)

hwaityeah, ellia! :D