and it doesnt matter which route you take,

as long as you arrive at the happiness you are looking for.

of course, there will be people who will travel the extra miles because of a decision i wouldnt exactly label wrong; there will also be people who will manage to find the shortcut and get to their destination a lot earlier. but it doesnt matter as long as you get to the place you are meant to be at.

the many belts of extra time taken to find your way there is not for nothing; everything has a purpose, a reason. maybe you have learnt something you'd never expected yourself to learn, or maybe you discovered something about yourself you never knew before. whatever it is, whoever they are, it is still a valuable lesson learnt.

and dont let anybody, never ever, convince you that you have made a mistake.




there are many people who have reprimanded me for choosing to be in early childhood; my parents, my friends.. many people. there are also many people who let slip of the look of distaste and disbelief when i told them i was in early childhood. just to let you know, i am offended. and you, should be ashamed of yourself.

of course, it is bizzare to you that i have decided to ditch retail management/ mass communication (i got into both) for early childhood. but to me, it is only ellialyn to have random feelings sprouting out of nowhere and it is all the more only ellialyn to let her feelings lead her along.

yes, it could have been an unwise move made and perhaps also a spur-of-the-moment kind of thing.. and yes, there were times when i regretted, there were also times when i allowed people's words get to me.. but then i realized that no matter what i did, it was never anything bad or wrong. and it never will be.

maybe to you, being an early childhood educator is simply teaching ABCs and 123s or maybe even changing diapers, but to us, it is more than that. yes, we teach ABCs and 123s and yes, we change diapers too, but it isnt as simple as you think it is. do you know that when changing diapers, you have to let the child know what you are doing and what you are going to do? it is a form of respect, and children deserve so much more than what we have acknowledged them for.

im sorry, but there is a lot to being an early childhood educator and there are so many more aspects of a child that i have yet to see or experience for myself. there is no "more difficult" or "easier" job out there, every job has it pros and cons; it is up to you to see the good for the bad or the bad for the good.. and no matter how you belittle early childhood educators, please always bear in mind that we also deserve to be respected. it is a noble job, no matter how you look at it, no matter what you say about it.. it is a noble job.

and im sorry, although i know i shouldnt be, but teaching ABCs and 123s isnt all that easy as you think it is, either. and although im not going to stay in this line, all these knowledge are going to stay with me. at least i know, if i ever have children, that they are going to be in the hands of somebody who knows what and how i need and have to do. they are going to be in the hands of somebody who will not rush them into growing up.

these children- my children- will not be held back from playing with mud and sand because i know how important sensorial experiences are. i also know how important it is for them to explore and discover for themselves, to solve problems through trial-and-error.. they will never be scolded for asking a lot of questions because i know that it is only natural for them to do so and they should always be allowed to ask questions (lol, iep research). i know how to read stories to them the correct way and i know how to help them learn.

we scaffold, we guide, we facilitate but never direct. we have to learn how to work with the environment so that it will help us instead of go against us. we need to know how to provide inviting and conducive materials. we need to know if what we are doing is age/developmentally appropriate, if what we are doing will help children move a level higher. we need to know how different teaching styles affect different children's way of learning.. and so many, many more.

despite all.. im not staying in this field.

yes, i love working with children and i love watching my efforts pay off, knowing that i have done something good for them.. but as much as i love what im doing, it is not enough for me to call it a passion. but like i said, im not staying but im definitely walking away with things i could have never learnt anywhere else.

furthermore, it has brought me to a place where i met some of the world's most wonderful people, people i could have never met anywhere else. :)

no matter how stupid you think i am or ho wyou think i have wasted my time, i have enjoyed these three years and THIS is all that matters.

of course, lucky are those who already know what they want to do and what they have to do in order to get there. but, luckier are those who travelled extra miles just to get to their designated goal. you never know what kind of valuable lessons they have learnt along the way.. as we always say, the more the merrier; the "wasted" time may jolly well be to their advantage.

if any at all, these three years only helped to further establish a firm belief in myself and what i want to do. and no matter what everybody says, im going to go after it. i have the support of my parents and i believe in myself.. nobody is going to stop me from getting there, now. and well, if you are my friend, then the only words you are going to say to me are of encouragement and such of the positive, haha.

you know how people say that they write their own lives, but it's only too bad because they are writing in pen and mistakes cannot be erased? have they forgotten that they still have the pens in their hands and many more remaining pages left for them to continue to writing? if what is done cannot be undone, why not move on to improve, to do something even better? forget about the spilt milk, focus on what is left in the bottle and make the most of it.

after all, when i die, it is going to be my own life flashing before my own eyes. and i want to be proud knowing that no matter what i have done, i did without any regrets. this is going to happen because this is my life, and i decide for myself.

this is my life and this is how im going to live it.

what about you?